The City Lost In Fog by Hailey Klein

The water rushes over your toes as you stand on a beach staring up at the red bridge that disappears into the distance. Well, not really. But with all this fog around it sure seems like it. There are hardly any people around here. Most are back in the bustling city behind you. One may often stand, entranced, just looking at this city like it was made up; completely unrealistic to any architect or mayor who passes by. The buildings shoot up into the sky like pencils in a mug. The ground is still uneven from the many years of throwing dirt on top of swamp and nothingness but the locals don’t mind. Everyone here is relaxed like a baby in a soft sleep. Just a couple days and you’ll feel like before this you lived in Alcatraz. Sitting on a street corner close to the pier, I wait for the trolley. The people around me bustle at a pace I only thought existed in New York City as they head to shops and restaurants. Oh, that reminds me. I must get some clam chowder. How about Bourdon’s? Of course, don’t forget the bread bowl while you’re at it. The Bay grasps the air and sucks water into it making it humid and unpleasant. Who knew that one city could change the thinking of a simple but independent minded person. I only thought this possible in the city lost in an afternoon fog.

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5 Responses to The City Lost In Fog by Hailey Klein

  1. Cam V says:

    Good, striking images- the bay grasping the air; the buildings like pencils in a mug. You could take the bay image even farther- instead of saying “making it humid and unpleasant” talk about how the bay bloats the air, thickening it into a chowder…

  2. PMB says:

    Just a couple days and you’ll feel like before this you lived in Alcatraz. really awesome sentence. i really liked the metaphors used throughout. awesome jobski!

  3. CatBat says:

    Just a couple days and you’ll feel like before this you lived in Alcatraz.

    ^^i love that reference. this is such a great description, really really good job 🙂

  4. CatBat says:

    andddd i just realized i quoted the same line as Mr. PMB. Guess it serves to show that it’s a really good line!

  5. Kate says:

    I have to agree with Cameron’s comment, I really liked the imagery of the piece. I also like that it is told through someone’s thoughts:)

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